Letters to Nana
by Vonlenska
Summary: Nana folded the letter again clumsily because her hands were shaking; she was crying and her chest was hurting…


**Note:** English is my third language so I'm not good at it, please be gentle. -If someone wants to beta read this fic, please send me a message... I'll be very happy!

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><p>Nana;<p>

How are you? –I'm telling this just because it's polite, I don't really care… Don't misunderstand me! I'm just trying to say that this letter is not to talk about your health.

I know that you hate me, and I know it's my entire fault; I've belittled you, I've cheated on you, and the worst of all is that I've ignored your feelings for too long… I'm sorry. Maybe you could not understand me now, but keep on reading.

The first time I saw you, was in the Idea Hall. You were there with Osaki holding hands and crying… I was playing the best of me to catch your eyes, but you kept looking Ren, Ren and only Ren. It drove me crazy –almost insane- with jealousy because I wanted all the eyes on me. I caught Ren's movements for an instant and I saw it clear: He failed the compass when he caught your eyes. Then we finished and I over heard Ren talking with Yasu saying: "Nana is here! I even failed the compass when I saw her." And I thought it was you because the other girl was looking at Reira all the time.

A few time later Ren came to me and invited me to go to somewhere and play cards with his last music band. I said yes, of course, and I was hoping to see you again and say "Hey! Look at me at the concerts!" but when we arrived at that place, you were not there… There was the other girl! And Ren greeted her with a kiss and introduced me to _his_ Nana. I was quite out of place, so I decided to stay there looking how they played. Then someone push the doorbell and Ren asked me to open the door. Do you know who the person was? I guess you know far too well… My eyes grew wide open and I recognised you, you started crying and I didn't know what to do! Seconds before Nobu said that he wanted 'Hachi' to be there and Nana corrected him saying "Call her Nana, at least for tonight." At that moment I didn't understand why she said so, but I greeted you with that name.

You prepared us some dinner, some tasty dinner like I've never ate before… I wanted to start to talk to you so I took the tomatoes as an excuse to start. You were so nervous and started to babble about your friend's vegetables… I didn't care because we were talking but I found you quite adorable and it scared me to death because you were not seeing at me at the concert, even if you said you saw us and we were great… I was really scared about the things waking up inside me –then I was saved by the bell.

When you went to buy more drinks I used an excuse to take my leave before you came back. The following day I asked Ren for your number… Even now I don't know why.

When we found and went to that hotel you were excited and looked so innocent and pure that I was really near to ask you to take you home and forget about the issue… But I sensed that you wouldn't run away, that you wanted it too, so we had sex.

Nana, I know you were a little depressed because of me and you thought that I was toying you, and truth be told I was… But not after the second night.

That night I was in a club with Trapnest, Nobu and Shin when our manager came and asked me to sign some autographs and I started to do it right then. Ren came and ask me for one: -"I didn't know you were a fan of mine, Ren" I said; –"It's not for mi. It's for Hachi, Nana's friend" He said: "But write her name instead of Hachi!" Nobu said; "Yeah, but I don't know her name." Ren said; "Nana, Nana Komatsu" Shin said. I knew it was you since Ren asked me for an autograph, just wanted to continue with my devil-may-care charade.

I remembered then my promise, my chest hurt when I thought that you wouldn't be able to forgive me… So I said what happened between us. Nobu punched my face, Shin thought I needed a shower so he used his drink on me, Ren glared at me and said "She's my girlfriend's best friend, beware. If you want to play, find another woman… Nana is not a toy." I continued with my trademarked calm and went out of the club, took my car and run faster to your house. It was almost three in the morning, but you opened the door and started crying in my chest. I found you quite lovely and decided that you would be mine and only mine.

We had sex again and it was oddly enough –you had a poster of Trapnest above your bed, it was like shag you in front of the members of my band!

That's all for now, Nana dear - tomorrow you'll have the next letter.

_Nana folded the letter again clumsily because her hands were shaking; she was crying and her chest was hurting… Takumi had send letters to her from time to time since he was living in London, but never before he had send that kind of love letters to her, and tomorrow she'll have more? Why was he so sure? He was in another country; the letter could arrive the next month__ but he sad it'll be there for her the following day … He is up to something, that's for sure!_

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><p><strong>Note:<strong> I think I'm one of those people who think that Takumi really loves Nana -even if he cheats on her and belittle her... It's all a charade, he really cares for her and loves her.


End file.
